|
Beat The Engagement Blues!
Most fiancées experience "unbride-like" emotions, says an expert. Here's why.
by Allison Moir-Smith
What helps brides most, I’ve found, is to embrace reality instead of remaining wedded to their fantasies.
Fantasy: Once you’re engaged, the decision to marry your fiancé is final.
Reality: During your engagement, you evaluate your fiancé and the relationship all over again, with even more intensity.
Why? When you were just boyfriend and girlfriend, self-protectively, you may have held yourself back from fully imagining a lifetime together. Now that he’s about to become your husband, a future with your fiancé has become very real, and you’re (understandably) looking at him with a more critical eye.
It’s normal to put your relationship under the microscope. Think of it this way: Each time you dissect and analyze your fiancé and your relationship and find you still want to marry him, you’re recommitting yourself to the marriage.
 (1 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ... |
Email to a Friend
Share on Facebook
Digg It
Delicious
Newsvine
Stumble
Reddit
1 Sharilee // Mar 10, 2008 at 12:58 pm
Thank you so, so much for writing this article. It has really helped to calm my fears and confirm what I already believed: that I am going through a crisis now, of losing one stage of my life, and going through another. (I am getting married in two weeks.)
2 R // May 25, 2007 at 12:12 pm
Thank God for this article. I sat in front of the computer with sever anxiety over my future husband and this article helped calm me down; at least now I know these crazy feelings of mine are not just mine.
3 joanie // Aug 12, 2006 at 4:52 pm
as an older (40s) bride-to-be, i was already feeling some of the things described in the article… it was good to see that i’m not totally off-base in what seems to my friends as ambivalence about the wedding… it’s a huge day, but it’s just a day, i’ll be married to my fiance forever… i also hope this will help younger brides-to-be with any jittery feelings, or cold feet… nothing worth having comes without a little fear, and being able to be sure of your decision is very important…
4 joanie // Aug 12, 2006 at 4:52 pm
as an older (40s) bride-to-be, i was already feeling some of the things described in the article… it was good to see that i’m not totally off-base in what seems to my friends as ambivalence about the wedding… it’s a huge day, but it’s just a day, i’ll be married to my fiance forever… i also hope this will help younger brides-to-be with any jittery feelings, or cold feet… nothing worth having comes without a little fear, and being able to be sure of your decision is very important…
5 Anonymous // Jul 15, 2006 at 12:51 am
I have been engaged for almost a year and have a year left til the wedding…and I am going through the engagement blues right now. This article was awesome. There have been many times that I have questioned if my fiance is right for me, but in my heart I always have known he is…this article helped validate some of my feelings of doubt and anxiety and see that what I am going through is normal. Thank you!
Read All 7 Comments on Beat The Engagement Blues!