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How To Know If He’s “The One”
Why roll the dice when you can know the right answer?
by Rachel Greenwald
So naturally, I took the path of any good drama queen: I dropped my bouquet, slumped into a nearby chair, and burst into tears.
Brad rushed over and shooed away the photographer. While he was aware that I’d had many doubts during the past year, he had none. My own hesitations, on the other hand, were quite serious; I’d even harbored a crush on another man during my engagement year. I’d confessed everything to Brad—I did love him, after all, and wanted our relationship to be honest.
But we were so different—opposites in too many ways. (More than one friend had observed that we were a lot like that Green Acres couple from the ’70s: I was “Gimme Park Avenue” and he was “Farm Livin’ Is the Life for Me.”) How could it work, I wondered, when reality would inevitably come knocking? We loved each other—a lot, as it turned out. But what sane person could believe that love alone would pass the test of time, particularly when 50 percent of today’s marriages end in divorce?
So there I was: big white dress, mascara running. “How can I say ‘forever’?” I sobbed. “It’s too long to commit to!” Brad took my hand. “How about this,” he said gently, not even remotely offended. “Can you commit to being with me for one year?”
“Of course,” I said, sniffling. “That’s easy, but—” He interrupted me.
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1 Josie // Oct 6, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I’m not quite sure yet if he’s the one for me…he’s really sweet and he treats me better than any of my other Ex’s and I feel like he might be the one and he feels the same…but I have my doubts sometimes…if you have any additional help please e-mail me at:
monkeys_rule170@hotmail.com
2 racquel // Sep 22, 2008 at 7:08 am
That was a nice story…like my love experienced with my bf..I love you James.
3 erin // Aug 10, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Love your advice and story! I’m for sure in the honeymoon period with the guy I met 4 months ago but started dating a little over a month ago. He makes me feel so special and I have never let my thick metal wall around my heart, down so easy, since my bad breakup 3 years ago! When i’m around him I feel safe and so comfortable, that the wall disapears like it never even exsisted! He actually tells me how he feels about me……but mostly with his actions. We have so many interest and hobbies in common…..that we can talk for hours. It’s all moving really fast and usually someone in the relationship gets scared away but, it gets better and better each time we see eachother and I have never starred into somebody’s eyes so much……it’s like we are trying to read eachothers mind and the scary thing is…..we are usually thinking the same thing and we both stop breathing and have o gasp for air. I was in a 5 year relationship and thought i was in love. Since i have met this guy….i have felt feelings that i have never expeirenced and am feeling so head over heals at this point. He has expressed the same feelings for me and I feel it everytime we are together. The feelings are great and at the same time…..miserable in a good way. I think about him all day and dream about seeing him again. Trying to take it slow but….when we are together…..the chemistry takes over and we are lost in every moment we have and it never felt so right! Uugh……any opinions?
4 Karen // Aug 4, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Very wise commentary and advice. Thanks.
5 Patty // Jun 16, 2008 at 10:16 am
Wow! I thought I was alone in these feelings but you have showed me that doubts can occur, that I can feel certain ways, but that I do love him more than anything and that this “soulmate” thing is what you make it. My story is identical to yours.
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