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Reaching The Simultaneous Orgasm
For couples, having an orgasm at the same time should be about fun not fuss.
by Ky Henderson
In Manhattan, Woody Allen’s character, Isaac, is chatting about sex with a group of well-coiffed partygoers when an attractive young woman admits, “I finally had an orgasm, and my doctor said it was the wrong kind.”
A bit taken aback, Isaac responds, “I’ve never had the wrong kind, ever. My worst one was right on the money.”If there’s one lesson to take from that scene, it’s that you shouldn’t attend cocktail parties full of neurotic intellectuals.
If there’s a second lesson, it’s that you shouldn’t over-analyze your orgasms. But that’s just what many couples do in their search for the much-hyped, yet often-unattainable, simultaneous orgasm.
Coming at the same time can indeed be a mind-blowing experience, but focusing only on that and nothing else can ultimately kill the mood and leave both people in the dust on the orgasm trail.
The key—at least, initially—is to approach simultaneous climax the way you would S&M, anal sex, or inviting a truck-stop hooker into bed with you both: as a way to augment your sex life, rather than its end-all and be-all.
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1 Debra // Sep 26, 2006 at 1:22 pm
I think it’s the powerful combination of coonection and deep love. You’re so insync with the person and you pay attention to the que. All women don’t need clitoral stimulation, I enjoy mine from deep penetration (not painful) but the deep movement and together we know each other. Over time its gotten better and more intense for both of us. We’re on the same wave length.
2 Anonymous // Jun 28, 2006 at 12:44 am
Tantric sex indeed is incredible and real. I have the luxury of truthfully saying that I am a totally passionate creature - but have truly had the most “simultaneous orgasms” with the one man I have truly loved the most in this world so far and that did make it better than anything else I have had. He would say “its not fair - you are just too good!! you are driving me crazy - but the fact is that it happened more because of our chemistry and true feelings for eachother. The times we were having “lottery talk” or telling eachother “our dreams” - was the hottest that way - I think you can make certain orgasms happen with tricks - but from experience - sometimes it is truly just pure love and chemistry that magically provides the hottest thing you have ever felt - in all positions. Awesome - just be free with who you love…and it will happen.
ILY P.
3 Anonymous // May 17, 2006 at 8:03 pm
Yes, expectations certainly have the potential to set a couple up for a less than expected experience but that doesn’t mean that an attempt can’t be made. This arguement would never stop a couple who have studied Tantric techniques.
The better you get at discovering and developing your own sexual/sensual potential the more enhanced your experiences will be. We are all responsible for our own pleasure - our partner is not. The more you learn, practice, explore, expand, and refine the more rewards you will reap. These are simple yet profound practices that have the potential to change not only your sexual experiences but your life.
Tantric sex isn’t really the destination, it’s simply one of the vehicles to the destination, but it is a very fun ride getting there!
Suzie@tantra.com