My Presence is Your Present

When Kevin and I first got together, I spent days – no, months – looking for the perfect Christmas present for him. I scoured EBay, dropped hints to try and discover what weird CD or movie he wanted, went to store after store searching for the Best Present Ever that would most certainly prove to him my undying love and affection.
Move forward about six years and you’ve got me making coupons with construction paper and Sharpie markers.

“This Coupon Good for One Trip to the Kroger for a Pint of Ben and Jerry’s Since You Won’t Get off Your Lazy Ass Ever to Get it Yourself.”

Or perhaps, “This Coupon Good For One Week Where I Will Scoop the Cat Litter.”

Or maybe even, “This Coupon Good for One Entire Weekend Where I Promise Not to Watch Lifetime Television for Women While You’re in the House.”

The thing is, after all these years, I don’t know what to get my man. There comes a point when all the clever, adorable, infinitely memorable gifts are no longer available because you’ve purchased them all already.