The Ups and Downs of Marrying Young

by Jay Rosenshield

A doctor and proud science geek, Emily is smarter than I am—one of the smartest people I’ve ever met, in fact—but suitably awed by my expertise in the areas of pop culture, world history, and spelling. She’s a feminine girl who can happily spend hours baking lemon squares, but she can drink straight tequila without making a face.

She’s a compassionate soul who thinks seriously about issues like poverty and global health, but she does a hilarious impression of Mr. Burns from The Simpsons. Oh, and it doesn’t hurt that she looks great in a slinky dress, and that her sexual fantasies involve other women.

In fact, I’d say we’re perfectly matched. But “perfect” and “marriage” are two words that should never appear in the same sentence. Perfect is an outcome; marriage is a process that can be massively trying under the best circumstances.

Those of us in good marriages are usually reluctant to talk about our problems in public—perhaps to avoid seeming disrespectful to our spouses, or perhaps just out of superstition—but they exist all the same. Emily and I may see eye to eye most of the time, but we’re married all of the time. How could we not come into conflict once in a while?

And our differences give us ample fodder for conflict.