by Hollace Schmidt

…like, say, blushing—or crushing. “The main characteristic of romantic love is obsessive thinking—you can’t stop thinking about your sweetheart,” says Fisher. “These drugs numb emotions and reduce obsessive thinking. That kills romantic love.”

The drugs in their crosshairs are a popular category called SSRIs, or Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors, which include oft-prescribed Zoloft, Paxil, and Prozac, among others. They work by building up levels of the brain chemical serotonin, which helps alleviate anxiety and depression, leaving us more content and more relaxed. The rub, says Fisher, is that basic neuroscience tells us that when serotonin skyrockets, dopamine plummets.

And dopamine, the “wanting” chemical, is what makes us yearn for a piece of chocolate or a promotion at work, and, as Fisher learned in her study (published in 2005), which examined brain scans of 30 people in love, it’s also the driving force behind budding desire—the stage when you’re anxiously awaiting a call or an email from someone you can’t stop thinking about. “When you take SSRIs and drive up serotonin, it stands to reason that you not only suppress dopamine but also romantic love,” she says.

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And then there’s the randier half of the equation: Some studies show that as many as 70 percent of people taking antidepressants have some sexual dysfunction, according to Anita Clayton, a psychiatrist with the University of Virginia Health System and a leading researcher on these drugs’ sexual side effects. A study she led last year found that women on SSRIs are most likely to experience arousal problems—they can’t get in the mood for sex, either mentally or through vaginal lubrication, and she adds, “they may also have trouble achieving orgasm.”

The reasons are twofold: SSRIs lower the levels of testosterone and dopamine in the body, and can also alter vaginal sensation, leaving users without much feeling—or so sensitive that sex is painful. The side effects may go away in time. Often doctors add a new drug to the mix to alleviate them, switch up medications, or, less frequently, recommend a short “vacation.” But patients are often reluctant to mess with a formula that’s working—despite the drawbacks.