McConaughey On Going Out On Top (Or Not)

by Tom Miller

According to the New Zealander website Stuff, Matthew McConaughey wants to go out a winner, like his old man. Evidently, McConaughey’s dad died just after having intercourse. And Matty McC wants to follow in pop’s footsteps. We did an informal poll and, yep, 100% of guys want to go the same way.

We’re guessing that it’ll go down something like this:
Matty McC: Was that good for you?
Lady (ideally, Camilla Alves): Yes, baby.
Matty McC: Then it was good for me and I’d say darn good for society as a whole.
Lady: Are you okay?
Matty McC: I think I’m fixin to have a stroke. Yup, here I go. Alright, alright.

In all honesty, isn’t this a little selfish? Isn’t the lady that he just finished sexing up going to be a little freaked out? People would expect this from Bruce Willis, he’s been planning a stunt like this as the last chapter of the Die Hard series for years (Is this thing on?).