The Owen-Vince-Threesome Rumor

by Tom Miller

Good times. Perez Hilton is reporting that some chick claims that Owen Wilson picked up some broad at a club in Miami and brought her back to his boat for some action. Per her account, someone (maybe Vince Vaughn) was waiting the wings for a little threesome. That’s right, this Miami resident (or possibly tourist) may have been the meat in a Double Down-Hansel sandwich. The woman said that she bounced as soon as the idea was introduced and never actually saw the other dude.

A Miami Herald celeblogger claims that Wilson has been really enjoying his stay in Miami and that the story is at least plausible. She alleges other instances of Wilson being involved in a celebrity ménage à trois. Sure, anything is plausible (or possible, which ever one means that it could conceivably happen). But we find this story really hard to believe. Maybe the lady went home with a guy that she thought was Owen Wilson and when his buddy popped out of the head (the bathroom on a boat), like a goddamn magic show, she left. Maybe it was all a big misunderstanding. Maybe we’re hoping that Owen and Kate Hudson make it this time around. And maybe we don’t like the mental image of a somewhat corpulent Vince Vaughn going fingercuffs with our favorite sad clown. We choose not to believe any of this story. Or any other wild accusations about Owen Wilson unless substantiated by thorough documentation.